Video Just Might Kill This Blogging Star
Like a recurring infection, I’m back!
Last week after the skin biopsy appointment, I kind of had a meltdown. Thankfully, I have a boss who didn’t fire me on the spot for my total instability.
It’s not even worth retelling the tale, but nutshell: the dermo couldn’t do a biopsy and unless I happen to have a serious blister attack when I’m within five miles of his office, he can’t do one.
And this is what I’ve realized: I find not caring to be one of the most offensive actions on the planet. Like, tell me you’re stupid. Tell me I’m stupid. Tell me you don’t know how to help me. Tell me to find another doctor. But…care. Or act like you give a fuck about me, just as a human being, if only on the most base of levels.
I’ve just reached my limit with people who are unkind. I know that “mean people suck” is a trite expression but you know, they really, really do. I’m just done with mean people-it’s an advantage of being in your thirties. You no longer suffer fools.
As therapy, I spent two days cleaning our garage. It is a job of epic proportion and it isn’t done yet but there is something so satisfying in throwing things out, consolidating, making things prettier. Putting everything in its place both in the garage and my mind; it gives me a feeling of semblance and control, which is something I really needed.
I have this tendency of letting anxiety, aggravation, pain build up instead of addressing it on an incident-by-incident basis. I don’t ask for what I need and then I encounter some sixty-seven year-old skin doc who wants to get me out of his office within five minutes so he can collect my co-pay and get to the business of practicing his short game and I just sort of implode.
Enough of that fuckery. Other exciting things on the horizon…
I’ve been in a weird space with food. Because of the Celiac disease and the pain and anxiety that food now causes me, I have this fear of eating anything other than the five safe foods I’ve discovered. And you really cannot live that way. I mean, Ore Ida mini tater tots are the best, but I’ve had it with shredded potatoes. Now, my newest thing is meat. I don’t know how this happened but I can’t eat meat. The thought of eating something that has bones in it, or once had bones, makes me dry heave. I can’t even watch Chopped on Food Network without gagging.
Instead of totally freaking the freak out, I’m taking it as a sign that my body is speaking to me. It’s time for a change and I can’t believe it but maybe this change is vegetarianism? The one thing I can’t fathom giving up is bacon. I have no respect whatsoever for the pig. But I may make the full leap. I don’t know yet.
I’ve been wanting to really get back on track with clean eating and fitness because I know I need to take the next steps with my site and start more promoting and vlogging. Yes, friends, videos of me talking about all sorts of random topics! To do this, I need to feel like I’m in tip-top shape, physically and mentally. Oh, and not too much info yet but there may be some TV and radio opportunities for me through Evil Beet, so self-confidence is something I need to be focused on.
Kids are good, Aspie is home on vacation this week and has been walking around in his robe all day like Hef, Veruca is flipping out because she says she can’t move her eyes (she can) and that means she’s no longer growing (she is) and Devil Dog just passed Veruca in the body weight and shoe size game.
This entry was posted on Monday, April 20th, 2009 at 5:41 pm and is filed under Celiac Disease. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
April 20th, 2009 at 5:53 pm
Oh I feel your pain with the doctors. I recently just blogged about this myself, it’s so infuriating.
In good news the asian hookers are back…must have been the work fuckery.
Love you kiddo
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April 20th, 2009 at 7:02 pm
“Walking around in his robe like Hef”…HAHAHAHAAA! I’d like a week of just watching (read: OBSERVING) your kids interact with you.
Wendie, just from the little videos you post with your kids we all know that you are engaging and profoundly witty. Jump IN with both feet. Also? You have a very TV-friendly face: Gorgeous big eyes, great teeth and skin…you’re very, very pretty. A bit of a total package overload. So quit yer bitchin’ and moanin’ and do it, mmkay?
xoxo Lame-O
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April 20th, 2009 at 7:56 pm
Oh my god… GO VEG! If you think you’re going to miss the taste of meat that badly, pick up some Morningstar Farms products (corn dogs, riblets, chicken nuggets, sausage patties, etc…). Of course, my family tells me it’s only because I haven’t tasted REAL meat in so long.
But do it! Of course, you’ll still miss that bacon. Maybe it will help with your working out, though.
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April 20th, 2009 at 8:00 pm
And by the way, Morningstar Farms does have fake bacon, but it tastes like shit so I don’t bother with it. It tastes good in other stuff (like baked potatoes) but it’s not a great substitute for bacon eggs.
http://www.seeveggiesdifferently.com/product_detail.aspx?id=352
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April 20th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
I’ll check that out! The problem with vegetarian substitute meats is that they are loaded with gluten and therefore off-limits to me.
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April 20th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
I went veggie in January–for health, not ethical reasons. I haven’t missed meat at all. I mean, AT ALL. I LOVE spinach, so that and mushrooms are my favorite “meat” right now. I know you have the gluten issue, so you have more to contend with, but I feel SO much better not eating meat. (We do eat fresh fish, FYI.) Try it for a month. That’s what I did–but then never looked back.
xoxo
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April 20th, 2009 at 8:53 pm
I’d have a heart attack if Wendie so much as LOOKED at a mushroom – much less eat one!
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April 20th, 2009 at 8:54 pm
Uh…I ate one last summer. How quickly we forget.
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April 20th, 2009 at 9:06 pm
It’s so good to see you again : ) (Well, you know what I mean).
I have been going to doctors for over four years about a mysterious gastroenterology ailment … nobody can figure out what’s wrong (and they’re even implying that I’m exaggerating or something), then Bam! I’m in the hospital for four or five days at a time with blood numbers that put me on the borderline of needing to create a living will. And during that time? The doctors use words like “ideopathic” and “no warning signs” and “just one of those things.” The medical profession has, frankly, screwed me over in many ways. I’m sorry that this guy gave you the same kind of experience. After all, everybody should be listened to, everybody should be validated, and nobody should ever have such serious medical anxiety almost entirely because of their treatment by medical professionals.
I’m so sorry things are so full of defecation on that front. Here’s hoping that things get better soon (although I’m hopeful in a realistic way, if that makes sense).
And I know this sounds even more ridiculous, but I think you have my e-mail, so if you ever need to vent to a human being that’s in a sort of similar but not really situation, I’m here.
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April 20th, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Fuck that doctor, find one you like, keep the bacon. Cherish Veruca and the rest of vacation! Muah!
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April 20th, 2009 at 9:12 pm
Every post you write seems to have something that smacks me in the face. This time it was: “I have this tendency of letting anxiety, aggravation, pain build up instead of addressing it on an incident-by-incident basis.”
I do the very same thing, and it can get ugly if I hold things in for an extended period of time, which I had done recently. I mean, we’re talking things bottled up for months. Anyway, thanks for making me feel less alone in my mode of dealing with things.
On the food and doctor front, I wish you the best of luck. Keep searching until you find the proper diet and M.D. that work for YOU. But don’t give up bacon!
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April 20th, 2009 at 9:34 pm
Oh dear! I’m so happy you’re back! My days at work haven’t been very exciting without videos of your darling kids!
I’m vegan and I always loved the taste of meat. Especially bacon! I never liked any bacon substitutes until lifelite fakin bacon strips. They are amazing! You can even cook them to be extra cripy and awesome. I checked the ingreidents, although online which isn’t always the most accurate information, and they do not contain wheat gluten!
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April 20th, 2009 at 10:15 pm
Wendie, take charge of your health and fire that derm dick! There is absolutely a better fit for you – ask around, ask for referral from your PCP, ask your friends. But don’t give up – it will get you the definitive diagnosis you need.
You can do it!!!
Tiff
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April 20th, 2009 at 10:27 pm
I’m a vegetarian and I LOVE IT! Like you, I had SUCH a hard time giving up bacon, (and christmas ham with brown sugar….*droooool). You don’t have to only go for the fake meat. I love these patties I get (either boca burger or morning star) and they are made with beans and corn and stuff like that. They are delicious prepared just like a normal hamburger with onions cheese ect. You should really go veg. At least for a couple of months. See how you like it. You might find that you really don’t miss meet as much as you thought you would!
whatever your choice, we’re behind u 100%! btw, you WILL feel more confident about yourself. I sure as hell do. I feel fit, healthy and fabulous! Try it!
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April 20th, 2009 at 10:28 pm
I swear to God. Marinated portobello mushrooms grilled til crispy are like STEAK. Try it at a restaurant first. I’m not making this up. Just a tiny bite? Open up….there you go. Good girl!
I’m a dork.
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April 20th, 2009 at 10:48 pm
I know that comment was directed towards Wendy, but I’m definitely going to try those! I can still remember that the last bit of meat that I had was about 5 years ago, and was a bacon ultimate cheeseburger from Jack in the Box… good times. Maybe I can replicate it using your Lifelite Fakin Bacon Strips and some Boca patties.
Thanks for the tip!
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April 20th, 2009 at 11:26 pm
Oh you definitely should. After pan frying them I let them soak the extra oil up in a paper towel and that seems to make them more crispy. I always make big awesome bacon cheese burgers as well! Sometimes when i’m eating i’m suprised life as a vegan tastes this good!
Thank god for toffutti cheese and vegenaise!
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April 21st, 2009 at 4:16 am
noooo Wendie!!! don’t give up ba-connnnnnn
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April 21st, 2009 at 9:49 am
As you know, that’s totally how it happened with me. I just COULDN’T do it anymore – completely grossed out. I was a full on veg for 2 years (and once for about a year in my early 20s). But after doing the master cleanse – and we’ve talked about this – it’s the weirdest thing but I don’t react that way to meat anymore… I actually started craving it.
Who knows – maybe at some point in life I’ll go veg again, but for me – I had some serious issues with protein and once I “reset” my body with the cleanse, for some reason I was back to carnivore status. Still struggling with red meat though – I don’t think that’s going to happen.
Good luck with this – I have some awesome recipes, even if you decide to start eating LESS meat, not cutting it out completely. And I know the REAL challenge is the gluten thing – so please be careful. Look up the Quorn products – I think some of them have no gluten, like the “turkey” roll thingie.
The support of JV will be priceless. And, more veggies can never be bad. Go Produce!
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April 21st, 2009 at 11:33 am
Oh God, your kids are just too cute! I’ve never seen kids like yours! I feel God loves them more than he loves other kids in this big world, haha
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I just showed this blog to a friend, and I’m really glad to say that she already is another Well Honestly Now fan
You’re so good a writing! xo 
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April 21st, 2009 at 1:34 pm
Hailey, my google search revealed nothing. I found LightLife Smart Bacon (which I think I’ve had before but I’m pretty sure I didn’t like it as much as bacon) but that name isn’t really that close to the name you provided.
Can you provide a link to the bacon that you’re talking about? I’m really craving a product that actually tastes like bacon!
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April 21st, 2009 at 1:45 pm
Roofie! I’m sorry I couldn’t remember the exact brand but they’re made by Lightlife
http://www.lightlife.com/product_detail.jsp?p=tempeh_smokystrips
there is a link to them. They’re made from tempeh, which is probably why they don’t have gluten in the ingredients. I used to be scared of using tempeh, but these are truly delicious! I buy them at Whole Foods next to the other packages of tempeh, which is also near the smart bacon etc.
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April 21st, 2009 at 5:36 pm
I’m actually headed out on a bike ride soon and my route will go past the local food co-op (typically full of these kinds of things), so I’m definitely going to stop in and buy some of this! (if they have it)
Thanks again for your help.
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